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  • How to Decide if Couples Massage is Right for You

    man and woman receiving massage side by side

    It’s almost Valentine’s Day and that means an upswing in the number of requests for couples massages. It also means an upswing in the number of people who are going to be dissatisfied by some aspect of either the booking process or the massage itself. You’d think that it would be universally adored. But it’s not. After 15 years, I can tell you that it’s not for everyone.

    But… Couples massage* is soooo romantic, isn’t it? If you believe the marketing pictures, it sure is. If you’ve ever received one in real life you know it depends on a lot of things. It certainly shouldn’t be like the picture I used in this post. Sure it looks all cozy and romantic, but how are those therapists going to massage the arm and leg that are in the middle with the tables pushed together like that? What if your arm starts to cramp up and you want to hang it off the side of the table? You can’t because the tables are pushed together.

    *While some places offer couples massage in separate rooms, most people associate it with two people getting a massage in the same room, at the same time. That same room, same time scenario is what I’m referring to when I use the term couples massage.

    Today I’m going to tell you how determine if couples massage might be a service you’d enjoy or if you should probably avoid it.

    You Might Enjoy a Couples Massage if…

    • Both you and your partner like the same amount of quiet/talking during a massage
    • The spa or wellness/massage center you’re going to caters to couples and has a room dedicated to couples massage that has adequate ventilation and space for 4 people to comfortably move about.
    • The spa or wellness/massage center offers chocolates, sparkling juice, flowers, or other special amenities for couples massages
    • You are both only interested in relaxation
    • Your relationship is still in the “honeymoon phase” and you can’t stand to be apart. (It’s a wonderful feeling, isn’t it? Hold onto it while it lasts because life beyond each other will eventually creep in and that can’t live without you’ feeling will be replaced by something deeper, stronger, and better… but less exciting)
    • One (or both) of you has never had massage before and is a little (or a lot) nervous. Having your partner in the same room can help make you feel more comfortable.

    You Might NOT Enjoy a Couples Massage if…

    • One of you likes quiet and the other likes to talk during a massage
    • One of you just wants to relax and the other wants some therapeutic work done on an area that’s bothering them – therapeutic work usually involves some questions or direction from the therapist and some feedback from the client, which can be very disruptive to the partner who just wants to relax
    • You like to schedule at the last minute or get massage on a walk-in basis. Couples massage requires 2 therapists to be available at exactly the same time. The closer you get to the date and time you’d like to get a massage, the less likely there’ll be 2 therapists available.
    • Either of you gets hot easily. If the room is only barely big enough for two massage tables and two people moving around them, I guarantee you it’s going to get HOT in that room. If the therapists use any kind of heat treatment, the room will start to feel like a sauna before the massage ends.
    • One of you really doesn’t want to get a massage. Seriously. If you enjoy getting massage but your partner doesn’t, I guarantee that you will not get the usual enjoyment out of it if you’re in the same room as your partner. The rest of your day probably won’t be up to the usual standard either. I can’t tell you how many fights and breakups I’ve seen in the lobby of places I’ve worked because a massage lover brought someone in who didn’t want to get a massage.

    That ought to help you decide whether couples massage is right for you and your partner. Don’t feel bad if it isn’t. If you both want to get a massage but don’t want to do it in the same room, don’t. There’s no law that says you have to get a couples massage on Valentines Day. For that matter, there’s no law that says you need to get any kind of massage for Valentine’s Day… Or roses, or candy, or jewelry for that matter, but that’s another topic entirely.